virus

so i'm staring down night number four of no sleep due to a virus that has attacked both of my children fiercely. i'm quite certain that my internal organs are on the brink of shutting down, my motor skills are compromised, and i am having trouble speaking in full sentences. (i feel like hell.) the whole weekend ella ran a fever. fevers can turn toddlers into mini hannibal lecters...shit they don't tell you in the parenting books number 452. she seriously is like jekyll and hyde...and you never know when she is going to morph from one to the other. it's like one minute she is dancing on rainbows in her ruby slippers, and the next she is ready to blow up her doll house with a hand granade. (crazy town.) finally last night...butch and i had both had it. he stated that he wanted to "stab himself in the face." (it was that bad.) after dealing with this virus for 2 full days and 2 nights with 2 children, we were both ready to dance off into the sunset...and leave them at the nearest orphanage. last night at 11pm, ella was sitting in our bed eating goldfish crackers, crying because "everyTING hurts." (including mommy's brain, honey.)

when your kids are sick, you so wish it was just you that was sick. you wish you could take on their pain and make them better. however, it also gets to a point that you can't take anymore. (no sleep for 3 nights and constant care will take you there.) tonight, i was dealing with ella's most recent hand grenade moment when i heard butch scream like a little girl in the next room. (what now?!) he's all high pitched, yelling..."ahhhhhHHHHHHH SHE'S PEEING ON ME! PEEING. ON. ME!" shortly before this, i heard him giving carrie raspberries on her chunky belly, so i hoped the pee didn't go in his mouth. (that could've been really bad.)  he was holding her on his hip at that point and she let loose all over him, prior to him putting her in the tub...so now they both needed a bath. (glad there wasn't any sharp objects nearby, because his self face stab might've happened at that moment.) i was calming ella, who was covering me in snot and he was in the next room getting a golden shower from our youngest. it doesn't get much more glamorous than that. our life would be a seriously convincing birth control commercial for teens. 16 and pregnant? nah...how about 2 thirty somethings, with 2 jobs, 2 kids, 2 animals, and a whole hell of a lot of craziness. it would scare the bejeezus out of any young couple. (trust me.)

so i laid both sick children down to bed tonight, knowing full well that neither of them will probably make it through the evening without an episode. i took off of work tomorrow to make a trip to the pediatrician. (i went to 'doctor's express' last friday...but i need to follow up, because that place is not legit.) butch stated that he actually enjoyed going to work today, because it was easier than dealing with this wicked virus. (i agree.) i'm beyond tired, but know things could be worse. (and thankful they are not.) if we all make it out of this week alive, and only covered in snot and urine...i'll be okay with that. for the love of all things holy...winter (and sickness) can be over any day now. godspeed to all those parents, like us, who are dealing with the same things. for i know your parenting joy and i most certainly feel your parenting pain. seems to me that the good most definitely out weighs the bad...it's just trying to find the rainbow through the hand grenade blast that is sometimes an issue. hang tight.