quotes

so a lot fun things happened in kindergarten in september...it's always the month where we are all getting to know one another. i've already posted a lot of the good ones, like the kid who told me her dad shits up the car and then locks the windows, and the 5 year old who said he wants to grow up to be a ninja warrior. (i wonder what that pays?) their energy and enthusiasm never ceases to amaze me...if i could bottle it, i'd be one very rich woman. here are a few other ones from this month:

"mrs. S...are you scared of werewolves and vampires?"
"yes...are you?"
"yes!! werewolves, vampires...and big dogs. all are REAL scary."
(indeed.)

"i have a wild cat at home...he's, like, real wild. my dad calls him yo-yo, but i don't think that's his real name."

"mrs. S, when there is a storm, my grandma told me the thunder is the devil and his wife fighting...but she also told me that is just a story, so not to tell anyone. but i'm telling you."
(if these people knew half the stuff these kids tell me...aye aye aye.) 

"sometimes when it rains, my dad lets me take my shirt off and run around outside! i like to jump in the puddles, too!!" 
(this dad sounds pretty awesome.)

we read the story the gingerbread man and the kids had to decorate their own gingerbread men on paper. it was playtime when i came across this gem:

i called the artist back to my desk and said, "hey, toots, can you explain your picture?" she said matter of factly, "well, i wanted to make a gingerbread girl...that's why she has long hair, and lips." (and boobs?) so i went on, pointing..."well what are those?" she said, "candies!! the old people decorated her with round candies." (thank god.) kids are great. 

there is a new kindergarten teacher this year at my school, fresh out of college. she has awesome ideas and has been a great addition to our "team." she approached me last week and let me know that she got some movies (we still use VHS!)  from her church. they were all fairy tales, which we had been studying for most of september. i went over on wednesday and asked her if i could grab "the lion and the mouse" to show my kids before dismissal time. i walked back to my classroom, picked up the kids from Art class...and was about to put the movie on when i flipped it over to read the back. this is what i saw:

i decided it would be best that i not show this one, as i never heard of the fairy tale THE ASS AND THE STICK. i put a yellow post it on it that said..."ummmm....???? wonder what the third story is about, sounds very interesting." i sent it back over to her via student. i saw her shortly after dismissal and raised my eyebrows at her... and she immediately started losing her shit laughing and was like, "I DIDN'T KNOW!? I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WAS ON THERE! I DIDN'T LOOK AT IT BEFORE I GAVE IT TO YOU!" (still laughing and kinda embarrassed.) she then added..."i really think it's about a donkey and a stick, right?" i replied, "yes, i don't believe that there is a fairy tale about a stick up someone's ass...at least i didn't learn about that one in elementary school." funny stuff. 

"the human race has only one effective weapon, and that is laughter." -mark twain