god

so today in my county, we had a school wide systemic lock down drill to practice what would happen, should a gunman enter our building. luckily, i was able to prep and practice with my class before the actual drill, because quite frankly…they didn’t understand the term “drill” and when i started discussing it with them, some of them got really scared. they believed that a “bad guy” really was going to enter the building at that moment. so then we had to discuss that this was just for practice in case something like this should really happen. (poor things.) anyway, our plan is to all go into the bathroom in my classroom and lock the door. i have to cover the window that is in my main door, and also pull down the blinds. all the lights need to be turned off...and all of them must remain silent through it all. (they are a gaggle of 5 year old giggle boxes, it was tough.) we practiced the first time, and 2 children started crying...because one of my biggest knuckleheads decided it was a great idea to flush the (extra loud) toilet and scare the bejeezus out of all us that were squashed in the pitch black bathroom. (little johnny. yes.) he thought it was hilarious, and i then had to explain how very serious this was. i think he got it. (but probably not.) anyway, the reason i am telling this story is because of this…shortly after we went through the drill, i sat the kids on the carpet and asked them if they had any questions. a bunch of hands shot up, and one of the little boys said this…”i just have one question…when it is dark in the bathroom and we are scared, are we allowed to pray?” (wow.) i explained to him that he could most definitely pray, as long as it was silently, and then he went on to say…”well i would pray to god for everyone to be safe, like me…all of my friends, and you, too, mrs. scheib.  oh, and i don’t like the dark either, so i would pray that it would get light soon.” (i had a moment and had to pull myself together.)  soon after, we dove into a discussion about god. i didn’t mean for the discussion to go there, but it did and because i teach in a charter school…i have the freedom to discuss such things as religion. and of course, some of the things the kids were saying were hilarious. for instance, did you know that god lives in outer space and has a house on the moon? (i didn’t!) did you know that he played football when he was a kid? (i had no idea.) did you know that god had a fight with the devil to see who would live in heaven, and he won? (nope!) did you know that he learned kung fu when he was younger? (no way!) they were spewing out these “facts” about god and i was internally losing it. (it was funny stuff.) however, i was really touched by that first simple question…”are we allowed to pray?” in most schools these days, the answer is no. can you imagine? this five year old realized that this was a very scary thing that was bigger than him, bigger than all of us…so much so that we had to hide in a dark bathroom together and lock the door. he went to another place…he looked to god to comfort him. he’s five. the whole thing kinda blew my mind. my point is this…i am not an overtly religious person, nor do I go to church often. however, i do believe in god. i believe that there is something bigger than myself out there, and i believe that everything happens for a reason. i find all of this talk about pushing god out of our schools truly absurd. taking “under god” out of the pledge of allegiance that we recite everyday? ridiculous. not allowing children to pray in school? terrible. while crammed in the dark bathroom standing silently with all of my students today, i couldn't help imagining how very scared those teachers and students must’ve been in connecticut, or during any other school shooting. it shook me just to PRACTICE it…and it shook the children as well. i’d imagine that the real thing would be truly terrifying. however, i do know one thing for sure…if something such as that did happen at my school, i sincerely hope that god would be there amongst me and the little people...wearing a football uniform or an astronaut suit for good measure.