done

i rolled over this morning and said to my husband, "things have been really quiet around here...maybe we should think about working on baby number three to shake things up." he said nothing for quite some time, and then replied, "i hope you are joking." i was. (kinda.) my question is, though, how do you really know when you are "done"? (done having kids, that is.) i mean, almost immediately after you have your first, people start asking when you are going to start trying for your second. when you have your second they say, "so are you DONE?" or my favorite is, "are you going to TRY for a BOY?" (because i have two little ladies.) in a perfect world, yes...i would like to have a boy. but guess what? you can't pick the gender of your kids. at least both of mine are happy and healthy, and i can't imagine a my world without them in it. (i never take that for granted. ever.) why do we ask each other these dumbass questions? when people ask me i just tell them i have no idea. (because i don't.) i had this same conversation with some other mommy ladies i was hanging out with last night...as our combined army of 10+ children ran around the house and yard. (pandemonium.) i asked them (who i think are done) how they knew they were "done." what it  boiled down to was this...you just know. even though i don't know if i'm "done" for good. i'm done for now. if you asked my husband, he's done. (for good.) our children have chewed him up and spit him out. (sissy.)

shortly after i informed him that i was (sorta) joking about having more kids, butch got ella out of her crib who was yelling, "it's light outside! it's light outside!" from across the hallway. she equates waking up with the sun waking up. i wish she would give her sister the memo in the middle of the night sometimes. however, carrie was still quiet...so we left her alone. turns out she was quiet because she was in her room pooping her pants. as soon as he opened the door to get her, i heard him yell, "oh my LORD, carrie! YOU STINK!" i was in my bedroom laughing, knowing that he would have to change that crappy diaper. carrie was giggling and i could hear butch saying things like, "what did you EAT?!" "this is AWFUL!" and..."it smells like ROTTEN MEAT!" (sorry i missed that one.) then we went downstairs for breakfast. as he was thoughtfully chewing his donut, he said, "whoever invented the boston cream donut is a genius. a fat genius." (as he had the cream smeared all over his cheeks.) i just said dryly, "are you serious?" he replied, 'they are SO GOOD!" (yes, he was serious.) it doesn't take much to make him excited. give him a donut or a discount on something and the guy is set for a week. speaking of discounts, he took ella shopping yesterday and came home with a pair of pearl earrings for me. turns out he got a coupon in the mail for a FREE pair of pearl earrings and he was delighted to cash it in. he said, "they didn't even try to sell me the set this time." (this time?) so he's done this before? i didn't ask. however, i know damn well that he got me a pair of black pearl earrings for my birthday...so i'm guessing those were also free. (busted.)

he also came home with a pair of running shoes for me...in the wrong size. i said, "why didn't you just call me and ask me my size?" we've been together over 10 years and this man still doesn't know my shoe size. he said, "well i wanted to surprise you!" i said, "surprise me with the wrong size shoes that i have to take back!?" he snickered and shrugged his shoulders. (i guess it's the thought that counts.) our anniversary is in 2 weeks, so he informed me that the pearl earrings and the wrong size running shoes are my gifts. (gee whiz, thanks!) men are such fools sometimes. anyway, i took the shoes back and traded them for the right size today and decided to also go to target and trader joes while i was out. i've been to trader joes before...but really, what a weird place. lots of hippies and lots of horned rimmed glasses. i'm not judging, but i really didn't fit in wearing my sperry's and side pony. actually, i think half of the people shopping there were high. it was like 10am on a sunday morning and i felt like i walked into a grateful dead concert, rather than a grocery store. bob marley's white sister wearing a sweatshirt (aka the cashier) proceeded to ask me if i was enjoying the weather. i told her that i was, in fact, loving the amazing fall temperatures. she then told me that she hopes the weather is this nice next weekend because she is going to the renaissance fair for her birthday and the last 21 birthdays she's had really sucked, so she's hoping her 22nd is the best ever. she went on (as i was nodding my head) to tell me that she didn't even have a good 21st birthday because she hung out with a guy that complained about his ex wife all night. she shared all this while she was scanning my sausage and squash. strangers have a tendency to overshare with me (it's happened many times)...however, this was more than i bargained for on a sunday morning. i smiled and said goodbye to my new bff and headed out into the sunshine.

going grocery shopping without kids is like going on a mini vacation for most mothers. it's quiet, it's peaceful, you don't have to push around the racecar cart or worry about your kid making a scene in the cereal aisle. (it's nice.) however, the whole reason i went to trader joes, as opposed to my "normal" store is because i am planning on eating paleo food all week because i don't have to cook for boston cream boy. i looked up some awesome recipes yesterday and i had to get some weird stuff that only trader joes would have. (ie/ frozen artichoke hearts) i've also noticed that even though i'm still running, i've let at least 5 pounds to creep back on around my middle. (ala muffin top) pumpkin rolls and pumpkin beers are good, but not so good for the waistline. i will also not be able to run solo this week, my two 25 pound bowling balls with be accompanying me in the jogging stroller. i actually ran this weekend with the double jogger, forgot how hard it was, and dry heaved a coupla times along the way. (no joke.) however, i didn't go into full vomit...so that's a success in my book. and so, as this sunday night comes to a close...i am kinda dreading a week without warren. even though i do the majority of the stuff around the house, he does do some stuff other than sit around and scratch his balls. he clips coupons, he allows me to go to the grocery store without chaotic company, and he changes the occasional dirty diaper. as i hop on the paleo wagon this week, i will hold on for dear life. hopefully the nonsense stays at bay and i have nothing to report. however, knowing that there is always a calm before the storm...i'd bet you a pair of pearl earrings that the opposite will happen. a pair of pearl earrings or a pair of nikes...take your pick.